thePencil.org secularavatar: April 2006
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Friday, April 07, 2006
  Gnome Chomsky
I am opposed and have been opposed for many years, in fact,
I’ve probably been the leading opponent for years of the
campaign for divestment from Israel and of the campaign
about academic boycotts.

-- Noam Chomsky

Paracelsus said of old
The gnomic race do dwell below
Earth’s surface where on guard they stand
O’er treasures dear to them, and grand

Stubborn, cunning they won't budge
One inch from guarding, they begrudge
Attempts to breach their vigilance,
Their hyper state of fixed defense

Their weakness though, a ray of sun
The Aten’s fingers they do shun
If just one shaft's upon them shone
Directly they turn into stone

Behold our modern leftist Gnome!
Progressive author! Countless tomes!
Clever, adamant sentry he
The treasure safe, his guarantee

Gnome's Wall constructed 'round the prize
Israel safe from blaming eyes
From guilt or culpability
Zionists remain rap-free

Apache 'copters? US-made
Americans promptly obeyed
By Zionist pilots taking orders
From DC their true headquarters

Pilots of those F-16s?
Doesn’t matter, it’s routine
Americans do call the shots
They’re masterminds and don’t get caught

Israel Lobby? Ain't no such thing!
Your imagination's taken wing
Stop your whining, cease your cryin'
You been readin' Elders of Zion?

Your critiques will all be improper
Your efforts will all come a cropper
They must be directed at DC
America the only guilty party

(Didn’t we hear that one before?
Back in nineteen forty-four?
When Allies crossed the German borders
The cry went up: "I followed orders!")

Thus sayeth Gnome, alert on guard
By US lefties he's adored
With gnomic, steady, tough deflection
Israel earns his true protection

If you ask him, "What’s with that?"
Retort contemptuous comes straight at
you from behind his groupie shield
Safe from critics Gnome is sealed

Lo! Comes Jeff and Jim and Noah brave
Fearless paladins all, they've
Wielded sun-ray'd lances twain
Faulty gnomic logic slain

'Tis but little but 'tis a start
Timid lefties must take heart
Unsheath their tongues, their logic too
Zionist force-fields to subdue

These fields are found most everywhere
Where leftists gather, few do dare
To challenge Gnome and Zionism
It's time to start to breach that chasm

Show some spine, your courage stout
Consistency's what it's about
Principles? You can't be mute
Zionism = Racism, there's no dispute
 
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
  This just in: Huck Finn pro-Palestinian Terrorist!
Religion Trumps Real Estate Laws

"...[You can't] try to reason out a thing that's pure theology by the laws that protect real estate!".
---Tom Sawyer


Tom: "A crusade is a war to recover the Holy Land from the paynim."

Huck: "Which Holy Land?"

Tom: Why, the Holy Land -- there ain't but one."

Huck: "What do we want of it?"

Tom: "Why, can't you understand? It's in the hands of the paynim, and it's our duty to take it away from them."

Huck: "How did we come to let them git hold of it?"

Tom: "Why we didn't let them git hold of it. They always had it."

Huck: "Why, Tom, then it must belong to them, don't it?"

Tom: "Why of course it does. Who said it didn't?"

Huck (narrating): I studied it over, but couldn't seem to git at the right of it, no way. I says:

Huck: "It's too many for me, Tom Sawyer. If I had a farm and it was mine, and another person wanted it, would it be right for him to--"

Tom (interrupting): "Oh, shucks! You don't know enough to come in when it rains, Huck Finn. It ain't a farm, it's entirely different. You see, it's like this. They own the land, just the mere land, and that's all they do own; but it was our folks, our Jews and Christians, that made it holy, and so they haven't any business to be there defiling it. It's a shame and we ought not to stand it a minute. We ought to march against them and take it away from them".

Huck: Why, it does seem to me it's the most mixed-up thing I ever see! Now if I had a farm and another person--"

Tom (interrupting again): "Don't I tell you it hasn't got anything to do with farming? Farming is business, just common low-down business: that's all it is, it's all you can say for it, but this is highter, this is religious, and totally different".

Huck: "Religious to go and take the land away from people that owns it?"

Tom: "Certainly: it's always been considered so."

Huck (narrating): "I am peaceable, and don't get up rows with people that ain't doing nothing to me. I allowed if the paynim was satisfied I was, and we would let it stand at that.

"Now Tom he got all that notion out of Walter Scott's book, which he was always reading. And it was a wild notion, because in my opinion he never could've raised the men, and if he did, as like as not he would've got licked. I took the book and read all about it, and as near as I could make it out, most of the folks that shook farming to go crusading had a mighty rocky time of it."

--Dialogue from Mark Twain's Tom Sawyer Abroad, NY, 1894. Published a full three years before Herzl's First Zionist Congress in Basle.
 
The willful failure of western progressives to understand Israel's role as a colonial, theocratic and apartheid entity contributes in large part to progressive inability to successfully oppose both the war in Iraq and America's push for total global domination.
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The secularavatar is a progressive activist grandmother from the Middle West who spent many years studying and travelling in the Middle East.

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